Personal Space

p e r s o n a l s p a c e 

(ˈpɜːsənəl speɪs)

noun

1. 

freedom to be on your own at times; privacy; autonomy

Self-confidence means being relaxed enough to allow your lover their personal space.

Many times we get into relationships and friendships were we do not feel obligated to our own space, or if we do ask for space it means we are no longer interested in the relationship/friendship. Personally, space has always been vital to me. I need time to breathe, think and be alone. I love the companionship of my friends/family but personal space is also something that I need, everyday. I believe we all need our space to build back our physic energy.

For anyone who is reading and you feel bombarded and stiffed into a friendship/relationship, ask for your personal space and do it in a way where the other person understands that the time taken is for you. I have been in this situation before, where I could not get my personal space because I felt like it was my responsibility to stay in contact 24/7 and this drained all of my energy to the point were I could not focus entirely on myself for a minute because I was so caught up being in someone else's space and what they expected from me. Even when I asked for my personal space from the person I felt as though I was committing a crime because of how the other person reacted when I said ' I need space'. I did not mean that I wanted to cut the person off entirely, I just meant that I wanted a b r e a t h e r to think about the things happening in my life. Sometimes we all become prisoners to other people's requests, needs and wants and this, my darlings, drains every energy out of us. 

So how can we rekindle our physic energy back to ourselves and out of another person? It's easy. Be selfish. Be selfish with your time, your space, your energy. It does not matter if the person is your mother, boyfriend, bestfriend, girlfriend, etc. Just do whatever pleases you without thinking about what the other person needs from you. The best thing to do is to let the person know you will get back to them when you can or just text/call back whenever you feel like, or don't.

In an interview with Oprah, Iyanla Vanzant said by giving someone time out of your space to the point where you are sacrificing yourself you are making them a thief, because you are giving them the time and energy that you barely have for yourself to them. She also spoke about a bible verse that says "My cup runneth over" and explained the importance of your cup (yourself) being filled up so that whatever comes out of the cup is for everyone else but what is the cup is for you. This could mean that your cup is filled with love or hate, strength or weakness, happiness or sadness, faith or fear, however whatever is in your cup will be poured onto others.

It is so important for us to regain focus on ourselves. To focus on our goals, whether in health, finance, friendship or family. It is important to regain focus on our dreams and to break down the limits we have placed on ourselves. Whenever I write my goals down I always tell myself that there is no limit to what I can do because "with man things are impossible, but with God all things are possible". To me God is the whole universe looking out for me with her best interest. Yes, God is a woman, because she gave life. <<<I just came up with that.>>> It is important for us to meditate and listen to our thoughts flow in and out of our brains so that we may know what we are thinking and what comes to our minds. When I say meditate I do not mean that you should take out your candles and begin to OM or do yoga but I mean to be in a quiet place by yourself where you can think about yourself and the dreams you would like to accomplish or whatever that comes to mind. However, do not dwell on negative thoughts. 

Since I have ventured off into my own personal space starting around September 2017 I have noted a few things... Since I have been giving myself the personal attention and tending I have been indeed of 

So from my list you can see that personal space and sometimes isolation is not a bad thing, especially when the main focus is on yourself and how you can become a better person. 

That's it for this post, if you feel like you are in need of time out for yourself and away from friends/spouse/family then you should take that time out and be selfish with yourself and spend more time with you and get to know yourself.

S o l i t u d e 

(ˈsɒlɪtjuːd)

noun

1.

Solitude,  is a state of being alone without being lonely and can lead to self-awareness. It is a positive and constructive state of engagement with oneself. Solitude is desirable, a state of being alone where you provide yourself wonderful and sufficient company. Solitude restores the body and mind.

Hara Estroff Marano